The Dead Sea is called the Dead Sea because it has so much salt that fish cannot live in it. The salt is so strong, you mustn't get the sea into your eyes or your mouth. The Dead Sea broke off from Africa somehow a huge number of years ago.
Once I got into the Dead Sea, accompanied by Edna, I kinda floated lopsided. And to our dismay, when it was time for me to get out, I couldn't stand up. So there we are, Edna and I, trying to get me to stand back up. I was like a fish out of water, except I was Gloria in water. Edna and I are laughing hysterically as I bobble from side to side.
From a little distance, Heaven Admin saw us. He thought Edna was doing some kind of new therapy on me! Osi, Edna's sister, thought I was in some kind of trouble, drowning perhaps, but sat back when she saw Santhan nearby. You know how I always want to appear savoir-faire around Heaven Admin -- hmm, have not succeeded yet. He always manages to see me at my most awkward moments.
There I am bobbing in the Dead Sea, and no one knows how to get me upright. Edna and I make up headlines. FIRST TOURIST TO RESIDE IN THE DEAD SEA... GODWRITER FROM IOWA PULLED OUT OF DEAD SEA BY TEN LIFEGUARDS AND CRANE...We are such wits.
I couldn't stop laughing. Edna, who can see what's going on, said that everyone near us was laughing as well.
I don't remember how I got out. Probably it was Heaven Admin who pulled me out by the nape of my neck.
Later as I sat on a deck chair in the sand, after having applied the healing mud of the Dead Sea all over me (wow, it makes your skin nice) I saw a plump lady in the Dead Sea who was walking out from the Dead Sea carrying her plastic shoes. I saw her fall into an unexpected pot hole, and she couldn't get up. I was tempted to rush in and help her but thought better of it. This lady was all alone. She didn't have an Edna or Heaven Admin to help her. The lady was serious as she struggled. Finally, after many attempts, she was able to get up and walk out and put her plastic shoes on and look cool once again.
Someone should do stand-up comedy at the Dead Sea.