My Brother Sid, Part 4
God tells us often enough how important it is to dispense with the past -- why haven’t I dispensed with it then? Why was the impulse so strong to write about my brother now?
There are two more happy scenes with my brother and my father and me that I want to tell you about. I didn't think of them before.
Both occurred at supper time. We were at the table, eating. Where was my mother? I have no recollection. I suppose she was busy cooking and waiting on us.
Both of these conversations happened during the good days of the Union Market when my father still went in to help out, and I was still in favor with my brother.
Sid and my father were both talking about an outrageous customer who had come in that day. She walked into the store, grabbed a dozen eggs, and walked out without paying and without so much as a by-your-leave.
Indignant, I said, “Well, why did you let her do that?
Comments
Maybe writing about it is the way to finally dispense with it. I am so enjoying reading these stories. I think you should write a book about your life. We are in Bisbee, Arizona and I have access to a computer so I am just now catching up with the last 5 entries. We talked with a local man last night about the town and he kept using the expression, "It's a mixed bag". I think that's a good genaric reason for the way things happen in life. So that is our curren favorite expression - It's a mixed bag. So can you write the book in your spare time?
Isn't that the truth, Sally! Life is a mixed-bag all right. I'm so glad you have access to a computer and can catch up and post.
Hmm, write more family stories? As the urge comes, I will certainly write them down. I couldn't stop this one!
This was healing for me -- wait until you read tomorrow's blog entry, and you will know how much.
I can hardly wait for the next installment! (Remember when magazines would publish whole books in installments?)
You've made me laugh and made me cry ... and proven yet again that people's real stories are far more interesting than anything an novelist can make up.
You point out so poignantly how we create our own misery. Sid's problems were Sid's, and why he chose to act toward you as he did was not your fault.
We all have that person or people in our lives, I think. Even if we have no idea why someone behaves toward us in an unkind manner, just like a child of divorce, we convince ourselves that somehow it's all our fault. If we were better, if we were smarter, if we were prettier or stronger or more helpful, then Person X would love us as much as we wanted them to.
By the way, I agree with all who wrote saying "We want more ... write a book!" Your writing is so open, honest and caring.
Gloria Dear, I have often asked Holy Spirit to help me understand A Course In Miracles where it says, "You never hate your brother for his sins, but only for your own." I have come to see that when we allow something in us to separate us from each other, it brings up guilt in us and this is very hard to bear, so we make it the other person's fault. I am sure your brother never stopped loving you in the least bit, but because he had treated you badly without cause, even thinking of you brought up guilt which hurt him to the core so that he had to push it deep down inside and not think about it. He couldn't look at it in himself and make it right by you because he just wasn't conscious enough. But what you are doing now is helping "forgive the past and let it go" for both of you, because TIME IS AN ILLUSION. The love between you can never die. "All your past except its beauty is gone, and nothing is left but a blessing." And when we share our stories, we share the blessing with the whole world. Thank you.
Gloria,
I like the sequel of stories as they have unfolded. I like it when you mention what God has said. It's great too, how you express and demonstrate how God has given us the gift to live our lives freely.
Gloria,
You are learning the lesson as you write. Your writing is loaded and crackling with your healing and growth!