Beloved Xena

Xena is making such great progress on all fronts. She is getting more comfortable psychologically, and she is limping a little less, and she seems to be in less pain from her fall down the cliff. But she is a heartbreaker.

She will limp down to the car, the only way she knows to say she wants to go for a hike. Yesterday Lauren, Jacqueline, and I were on our way out the door to go for a walk, and Xena leaned forward with a look in her eyes that said: "Are you maybe going to let me go with you?"

Of course, she has no idea why we aren't taking her. Hopefully soon we can go on real walks with her even if they are short.

Xena is spending a lot of time these days in my office.  She is under my desk now. She slept there last night.  She asks for nothing.

There never was a dog like Xena. Never a bark. Never a whine. Never a sound, well, except a little snoring I just noticed. She is more than obedient. After her fall, the vet told us that she had to be confined, so Lauren made a bed for Xena in her bathroom. Without being trained, even without being told, that's where Xena goes now in Lauren's house.  Lauren brings her in, and Xena dutifully goes to her beddie in the bathroom.

Xena doesn't try to get up on the couch -- we couldn't let her jump up now anyway because of her shoulder. More and more we long for a day when she will do something the least bit naughty.

We sure never had a dog like Xena. We never had a dog that wasn't a handful.  We never had a dog that didn't race around, jump on counters, keep wanting to go in and out, chew on things, bark, whine etc. Xena never even leaves muddy footprints.

Even little Ginger, apricot poodle, who had been severely abused and wouldn't let us go near her for a month, became a real dog and would dance around in delight and get into mischief.

Xena's progress is tremendous, and we are happy for each little thing. Each little thing is big, and we are so grateful.

The other evening, however, I saw part of a TV program called Dogs 101. The show shows different breeds and tells about them, what their strengths are, and other things like never have a beagle if you live in an apartment.

There was a scene in this show where you saw playful puppies. These puppies had no inhibitions. They were purely and delightfully happy.

The contrast between the puppies and Xena was so marked.  I felt as a mother with an autistic child must feel, so happy at her child's steps of progress, and then, when she would see other children who were not autistic, her heart would ache.

Through this all,  Xena gives me great comfort.  She soothes my heart. She heals something in my heart. I don't know what it is that has to be healed, but beloved Xena, she is healing it.