Oh, Xena, my Xena
Beloved Friends,
Yesterday, my daughter Lauren made a hard decision about Xena, and we must not be sad.
You remember that Xena used to live with Yael and her dog Nafi? Yael was fostering Xena because of Xena's special needs. Yael gave up Xena to Lauren when Yael moved out of Noah's Ark, and Yael didn't have a place to live. After she moved out of Noah's Ark, she did a lot of house sitting and dog-sitting and such, but she had no base of her own. In between, when she had no place to stay, Yael lived in a tent in Lauren's garage.
Now Yael has an apartment of her own and a yard.
Lauren, who was fostering Xena, will soon be moving to Chicago, the third largest city in the U.S. Even if Lauren could find an apartment where she could have Xena, city life would be too much for beloved Xena who is frightened by so many sounds and motions.
I will be going to Europe in September and soon after that, going on the three-month Oneness Journey and, even if I could take Xena, it would be too scary for her.
You may remember that when Yael would come over, Xena would literally jump for joy.
After Xena's 30-foot fall, we have not yet been able to take Xena on hikes . Those hikes were the one true happiness we could give her. And now we haven't been able to give her even that little happiness.
It comes down to our having to part with Xena sooner or later. And it's happened soon and suddenly.
Yesterday Lauren and Yael met for lunch at Revelations, and then Yael took Xena home with her. I didn't even get to say goodbye.
Of course, we can know that Xena has more fun with Yael and Nafi, and we can visit her any time we want, and, of course, when Yael has to go somewhere, Nafi and Xena are so welcome to come here.
I like to think Xena gained something from her stay with us, and that there was a good reason. I know we gained something from her. But, oh, what a process of letting go.
Xena had two beddies in my house. One in my office, and one in the living-room. The beddies are still here, but no Xena.
Comments
Lauren's and your love and care of Xena was and is a marvelous thing. She came out of her shell so much and was shown that other humans besides Yael could be kind and loving. So your 'goodbyes' happen at Yael's place rather than yours. It's not really a goodbye. Won't it be possible for you and Lauren to take her for some walks after Xena heals and before Lauren moves and you travel to Europe? Of course you will miss her presence in your home, but can't you keep the beddies there for when she visits? She still has her own place there, in another place she was loved and cared for as she is loved and cared for by Yael. And she's with her best doggie friend, which I know brings you much joy even though you're sad about her leaving. By her going now, it makes the transition easier for you all. A series of small goodbyes instead of an abrupt leaving. Lauren and you helped heal the soul of this little light being. What a gift you both are to the world.
Good for Xena and good for you, Gloria, and Lauren. Good for everyone involved including Xena's angel. Talk about God being in control for the best possible outcome. I expect that when we all get to the other side we will be astounded at who Xena is becoming. Well done, everyone!
“Xena had two beddies in my house. One in my office, and one in my living-room. The beddies are still there, but no Xena.”
These thoughts exude the sadness you are facing, Gloria, missing Xena whom you love so dearly. As I read this, I feel the sadness of beloved pets I have lost one way or another. I know that the sadness I felt directly after their loss was a lot worse then considering them, now. So time always helps.
And it helps, as Pam and Charles so lovingly point out that Xena is doing quite well with her new arrangements. Does it help to know that Xena can never be gone and we are always and permanently in contact with those we love, even if their physical absence seems to say otherwise?
With a spiritual arm around your shoulder in comfort…..Chuck
All the comments here have been, as you put so beautifully, beloved Chuck, spiritual arms around my shoulder.
When Lauren read the blog and your comments, she cried and cried.
And she reminded me that since Xena has been with us, Xena is much less afraid of people. The staff at Noah's Ark had noticed that Xena was more sociable.
I don't know why it is so sad. Mixed with the sadness is a slim sense of relief as well.
The good news is that Xena is alive and well. Of course, there will never be another Xena.
I have some broth in my fridge that I had made for her, and we'll take that over for her and Nafi later today. Will tell you later how she's doing.
Xena, You Lucky Dog. Now you have more homes then most other canines. You can go from one home to another. You must feel like a Human Millionaire. You are so loved by many even humans from far away. Lap it up Xena, lap it up. Be a very happy dog, till you become one with us all Love Jack
You were both the best foster dogparents Zena could ever have. I think your experience with Zena was a magical story. It put new love into the world that will continue to circulate on and on in ever widening circles.
Thank you dear Gloria and Lauren for the precious gift of Xena-love. Xena added a layer of pure, sweet, perfect love to your lives and to our lives through you. Xena is a teacher and a healer, just as you are a teacher and a healer. She needed you and your voice to share and spread her love. Your tender story of Xena has enriched our lives. We now have Xena-love to add to the layers of love that were your gift of Morris, Teeney, Jack, Sunshine and Ginger.
Morris was there to help you heal broken ribs. Perhaps Xena helped heal your shoulder. Morris and Xena both literally gave healing love to you, and you, the stirrer of hearts, passed it along to us.
The power of this tender love we have for animals is apparent by the pain we share for their “suffering.” Perhaps we should also focus on things it seems we are to learn from them.
In Heavenletter #1131, published on November 26, 2003
http://www.heavenletters.org/like-goldfish.html.
God said:
“All animals are your teachers. You are to learn from them.
Animals know the joy of life. Even abandoned ones do not name themselves abandoned. They know the universe is for them, and that they are secure in it. They have great trust in their own knowing. Their trust in their own beauty is great.
Animals know the joy of life, and they know what is important, and would teach it to you.
Animals do not get embroiled in the tension of accomplishing. They have no lists to check off. They contribute with their being. They contribute to you with their being.
Consider that all animals are enchanted beings. This they share with you.
You do not know who any animal is nor yet know why he was sent to you. But this you can know: there is something for you to learn and emulate.
Of course, you are the caretaker of animals, and so you are apportioned. But those innocent beings you call animals are very aware of their responsibility to you.
You have called animals dumb. They might call you blind and deaf. Animals have more sense than you. They survive and triumph under conditions that you could not withstand. Even the most downtrodden animals in your immediate world look up at you with love. No less the stray than the one who lives by the hearth.
Because animals know what is important, they focus. They focus more on understanding you than you do on understanding them. Beloved animals are open whereas you may have closed. Surely you have been closed to something, and you have many excuses for it. But the animal world knows not of excuse. What a lesson that is!
Even if you have no fish, no dogs, no cats, no birds in your home, a beloved animal of Mine will present himself to you today. He will have a great message for you. Look into his eyes, receive the message, believe you have received it and take the message to heart. You have been blessed with it.”
Beloved Bev, so good to hear from you on this blog once again. And thank you for sharing these amazing words of God with us. Ah, what beloved animal of God's will present himself to us today, I wonder!
Blogreaders, Bev used to live here, and she is a very dear friend of mine. If you would like to read a little about her and her special love for birds, you can here:
http://www.godwriting.org/god/heavenpetals/page/2
Bev, please post often and tell us about the birds outside your window in Florida now.